A family member recently sent me a very sweet email trying to help figure out how to get Southern (and me) sleeping longer each night. Writing a response to that email sparked the idea for this Q&A.
Q: Are you letting him cry-it-out so that he can learn how to put himself back to sleep?
A: I've heard very good arguments from both sides of the cry-it-out debate, and I've come to the conclusion that each family just has to do what works for them and that each baby is different. I don't think crying-it-out is what's best for us at this time.
Q: Do you have a set schedule since babies thrive on routine?
A: With Dustin's tennis schedule, sometimes he gets home around 4pm. Other days, it's not until 11pm. So while we don't have a set schedule, I try to do the same things around the same time most days. It would be impossible have a set schedule and still do things as a family. I do things in the same way each time so that there is a routine, and that works for us.
Q: Are you setting an early enough bed time?
A: I think it's more important for us to do things together than worry about sending Southern to bed super early. If we can adjust to Dustin's schedule, allowing us to see him for a few hours extra each night, why not? There is no reason we need to wake up early each day. Since we stay up later than usual, we just stay in bed later than usual in the morning. Inconventional, I know. But we get to do more things as a family this way, so I don't really mind being different. This will have to change one day, but for right now it works.
Q: Why not let someone else put him to bed?
A: I am breastfeeding, and we start the sleep ritual with a nightly feeding each night. I will try to begin the weaning process once he is 1 and able to drink cow's milk. Things may change then.
Q: Why not just leave him alone with Dustin for a weekend?
A: Then I would come home to find a starving naked baby in the backyard... haha! Just kidding, hubby!!
I know we're not doing everything perfectly, but I believe there is really no perfect way and that each mom and baby must figure out what works for them via trial and error. What we're doing right now works for us though it may seem a little crazy to others. Southern does sleep through the night between teeth. And he's such a wonderful baby in all other respects, I'm not worried. I want to do what's best for him, not for me. So if I get some sleepless nights out of the deal, it's not that bad. Pretty soon, he'll be in high school, and then I really won't be able to sleep for worrying about him staying out all night!!
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